Friday, April 18, 2008

From the No Shit File: Sharper Image may close

I'm just shocked it stayed opened for so long.
Some reports say that the Sharper Image Stores are closing up. Some can blame the Internet, high gas prices or the general state of the economy. What about the fact that I've never seen anyone buy anything there?

Oh I've seen people go in and sit on the messaging chair. Or play with the nail thingies. It's more of an interactive kids' museum than a retail store. They should charge admission or put in a Starbucks and call it "The Sharper Image Cafe."

Still not convinced? Let me put on my headset, sports coat and do my best motivational speaker. Right now I'm in a conference room at the Learning Annex in front of a crowd ready to be brain washed. (Go with me)

Who has ever bought something from Sharper image?
(Hands go up)
OK, that wasn't a gag or last minute gift?
(Some hands go down.)
That wasn't an impulse buy?
(A couple more hands go down.)
And this item that you bought from said store that was not a gift or impulse item, do you know where in your home it is? Could you find it?
(The rest of the hands go down.)
That concludes today's lecture. Books and coffee mugs available on the way out.

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