Monday, July 31, 2017

Star Wars Life Day Special gets a Redo

Life Day is going to be celebrated again! The infamous Holiday special that aired on ABC, "The Star Wars Holiday Special" is about to get a remake. Disney has decided to remake the TV show that's been a blight on Star Wars legacy.

"There's so much interest in a new special. One that's done right can play in a family's living room for Christmases for years and years to come.  Sid and Marty Cross are rumored to come out of retirement to cash in.

Friday, July 28, 2017

Men Starve as Wives Go "Girls Trip"

This country is facing a famine crisis. All over the nation men are left home to fend for themselves while the women are out four at a time watching the new movie, "Girls Trip."

"My wife came home saying, 'I'm a Jada,'" recalled one neglected husband, "I said, 'Is that the one who can cook? Because I'm hungry."

It's ironic that the main characters in the film call themselves the "Flossy Posse," said a frail man who hadn't eaten in 7 hours, "I wish I could floss. It's a waste of time."

Part time lawyer, Gary Alright said in his
lawsuit again the movie theater, "This is also discrimination. It's called 'Girl's Trip.' What about a movie for men. Like one where 3 or 4 men go to some place like Las Vegas? People would go nuts."

Because of the success of "Girls Trip," men are prepping themselves for the inevitable, a sequel!

Saturday, April 01, 2017

Watching TV on the internet makes you smarter than people who watch TV on a TV

Studies show that if you watch TV shows on the internet and not on TV, you look smarter. "I love 'Two and a Half Men' reruns" will make you look like a neanderthal.

But if you say, "I BitTorrentthe 'Big Bang Theory.'" or "I caught 'Kevin Can Wait' on CBS All Access" you'll look smart. It's the new way of saying "I don't watch TV," when you clearly do. It's TV. You mean to tell me everyone on earth are hypnotized by the blue light of the TV, but you?

Remember when you could say "I don't watch TV, except for Jon Stewart?" Now that he's off the air, what's a pseudo intellectual to do?
Well you might be back in luck.

Wednesday, September 30, 2015

Did SVU do a racist episode about tolerance?

Tonight's Law & Order:SVU, "Transgender Bridge" (my DVR called it "Transgender Bride"), was about a hate crime against a transgender teen. While it's great the show is addressing this hot button issue, they used old and racist tropes. Count them.

The transgender victim was a white, lived in a large, bright home with two very supportive parents. The perp is an African American teen who lives in a small apartment and has to make a hot pocket for his little sister because his single mother was "working a double."

The teen perp was in the park with his two friends and his sister. They were counting the money they made dancing, when they see the transgender girl. She was taking pictures. The teens harassed her while tons of African American teens egged them on and filmed it. One African American teen accidentally pushed the transgender teen off the bridge.

All the African American teens scatter. The only two people who stayed around, according to the cop on the scene, were two tourists, who were white. The cop on the scene corrects his pronoun ("he...her") but calls the other teens "Three black teens." Why not be totally PC and say African American?

In the first 5 minutes they show black people as close minded, violent, poor and uncaring. Meanwhile white people are caring, understanding, rich and good samaritans. Preventing and understanding hate crimes is important, but can we shed the racist stereotypes while we're at it?

Saturday, July 25, 2015

NBC pretends to know what they are doing

Deadline posted  that NBC will air all six episodes of "Mr. Robinson" back to back and then do the same with the Carmichael Show. NBC says that way people will sample the show better or something. But they are premiering shows in the summer and only ordered six episodes of each. So it feels like they are burning them off. Only because that's how networks have burnt off shows in the past. They were burry them in the summer and put them on back to back.

They said it worked for "Undatable." But that show never caught on. NBC just kept it on. So it worked for them - it's a hit in their house. Fine.
Carmichael and Robinson are great comics and nice guys. I hope their shows stay on forever, even if no one is watching. It's a hit!

Sneak peak at "Mr. Robinson."

Wednesday, July 22, 2015

7 Words I spellt wrung. #6 is obveous

1. Library
2. Their
3. Wrong
4. Batman
5. Spider-man
6. Obvious
7. Spell

Tangerine review

There was a period in the 90's when every movie had a more interesting back story. The way the movie was made was more interesting than the actual movie. The filmmakers shot the whole thing in a closed convenience store, it was paid for on credit cards, it cost $12.50 to make. 
It seemed like every Sunday The New York Times had another feature about a maverick indie movie. I went to all of them. 

"My LIfe's in Turnaround," "Fear of a Black Hat," "Clerks," "Go Fish..." I came into the city just to see the film. Most of the time the movie was ok and the behind the scenes story was great. 

I feel the same about "Tangerine." It was shot on an iPhone! Not even a 6, but a 5S! They used real locations! I couldn't wait to see a movie shot in my old neighborhood about the transgender hookers who were always on the block. 

Being shot on an iPhone, doesn't make it a good movie. My friend Owen Smith (name drop?) promotes his new comedy special as the comedy special shot on 8 iPhones, that he later returned. Is that enough to watch a stand up special? It happens to be funny too, but does it have to be? Well, yes. the iPhone is the gimmick to get you to rent the special. The quality is what gets you to finish it and recommend it.

The movie is two stories. One is about two sex workers who fill their day with drama and a frequent customer and his home life. 

Tangerine has a lot of great things going for it. The acting by the leads, who are non actors is really good and believable. There are a couple of great cameos from really good experienced actors that elevate the movie.

But there a tons and tons of traveling shots. The leads taking the bus, taking the subway, walking the street (that's why they call them street walkers!) and the cab driver driving his cab.  It felt like filler between scenes. I would have rather had a shorter movie or a third story line. 

Maybe the movie would have been better if it was written on text messaging. 

7 People I owe $ to. #5 will shock you

1. Rick ($100)
2. Sharlene ($2.50)
3. Sharlene's ex ($2.50)
4. Donut shop ($1 for many refills)
5. Rick ($400) (Why would he lend me money again? And more this time?)
6. Bus driver (1 fare)
7. The lady at the donut store (one glass display case)

Tuesday, June 09, 2015

Clint Eastwood gives free publicity to fake awards show

The coveted "Guy's Choice Awards," which rewards celebrities who have the best publicist, got a kick in the pants the other day when Clint Eastwood made a joke about Catlin Jenner. It was a nothing of a joke. The biggest problem with it was that it wasn't funny, I mean it made no sense. He just said a name of a famous person that he couldn't remember b/c he's old.

Spike TV,who airs the "awards" show, quickly pulled the joke and then told everyone about it. Seriously , has does anyone know about it, unless they told everyone about it?
I've been in the edit rooms. It's usually a couple of producers and the editor. What happened? Was the producers tweeting the editor?
.@Donnyeditor Whatever you do, don't tell anyone that you cut that @Catlinjenner joke #guyschoiceawards. #jkdo

I guess Jamie Foxxxxxx got a lot of press when he made his childish Bruce Jenner joke on the equally made up "I Heart Radio Awards." Which should be called, "Did Pitbull show up yet?"

Ok, must sleep. good night!

Monday, June 08, 2015

Is Louis CK an under rated perv?

Jezebel and other sites have been alleging that a certain comedian has been some crazy stuff. I have no idea if that's true. 

I had lunch with an old boss last week. We were talking about the Duggers. "Look, if you hire right wing nuts like the Duck Dynasty guys or white trash like Honey Boo Boo, you can't be surprised when they says crazy Christian stuff or date pediphiles." He was saying the way the Duggers handled their son, should have been expected.

I have the same reaction to Louis CK. Louis' comedy is totally honest about his weird sex shit. His persona is a sad perv. So we know it's possible. I'm surprised it hasn't been a bit yet. Cosby, like the Duggers, stood on a mountaintop and cast judgement on everyone and claimed to be perfect. Then he RAPED people. Lots of people. I think Louis should get a head of this like Lena Dunham and do a bit about it. 

If Howard Stern cheated on his wife, we wouldn't be so surprised. When Letterman came out with his affair, people were surprised. 

Also, has comedy become listening to someone narcissism? WTF or Girls, Patton Oswalt or Aziz or whatever, is just them telling us about them. Sometimes they try to make it funny. Like why did Lenan Dunham feel she should tell that awful story in her book? 

Saturday, June 06, 2015

Comedy is finally good

Amy Schumer, Amy Schumer, Amy Schumer!
Megan Garber, who wrote the article in the Atlantic ("How Comedians Became Public Intellectuals")about comedians being the new intellectuals was interviewed today on the radio.  First of all, she doesn't really commit to anything.

Also, just so know comedians are now talking about politics. The author pointed out that comedy addresses politics now unlike the comedy of the 90's. Forgetting that Chris Rock put out "Bigger and Blacker," Bill Maher had "Politically Incorrect," George Carlin was still touring, Dennis Miller had a show too... 

At one point Garber describes a bit from Amy Schumer they just played as "Not fun or entertaining... but important." That's what Paul Mooney has been doing since the 70's. I want Paul mooney to be the new Amy Schumer.

Saturday, May 30, 2015

The (NY) State of Comedy

The New Yorker's view of the world. 

Two articles came out this week about the state of comedy. One was in the New Yorker and one in the Huffington Post, which means only one of the authors got paid. 

Both talked about the state of comedy. The New Yorker brought up the Conan writer's ill fated tweets about comedy getting soft and becoming "Prom King Comedy." Then she said she likes the comedy so who knows what to believe. "I know it's dumb, but I like it." Fine. I can go with that. Plus, that's the slogan for the new Entourage movie. 

Huffington (re)Post went further and tried to define what today's comedy is. 

The Huffpo(ring) article literally says, "Call it artisanal comedy." So there you go. That's what you call hipsters standing in a laundromat, an ice cream truck, a working firehouse or where ever (but never a comedy club) telling humorous stories and god forbid jokes. Jokes have no place in comedy. It shows you're trying.  

Of course "Artisanal Comedy" a terrible name for comedy because comedy is supposed to make fun of "artisanal." It's supposed to make fun of people who buy artisanal cheese not the regular guy who eats cheese. Why not create "stuffy comedy" or "fox news comedy?"

"Artisanal Comedy" sounds more like an insult that a comic would say on stage. 

I think it's not fair to the comedians they featured in the article. A lot of them are really funny not matter where they perform. (Can you tell I might know some of the people in the article?)

I'm not going to wrap up this post. That would be too obvious and hacky. I'm just going to stop. That's what I call "Artisanal Blogging." So there.