Oprah goes and makes every other boss look bad

Talk show host Oprah surprised her staff today with $10,000 and a new iPad. She was just rewarding them for being great. Instantly as the news of the talkers generocity spread - so did teh nationwide depression. 

"My boss stinks," said Aron Smallhorn a trader for a large Wall firm, "I got a six figure bonus last Christmas, but nothing today."

"They won't even let us drink from water bottles," said Danielle Leap of Johnson County Social Services, "We have to bring a cup. They get an iPad, I have to wash a cup."

"This is bad for bosses everywhere," confined David Mathers - supervisor at Johnson & Jackson, a part minority owned shampoo company, "No matter what I do, it won't be Oprah."