Sunday, June 22, 2003

Reviews of pilots of new shows.
Finally a reason to read the Yenta, besides looking for typos and creative spellings. Other reviews to follow.

Recently I viewed three pilots for next year's season.
UPN's "The Mullets." Their new Tuesday night line-up is a strange color wheel if nothing else. At 8 pm they start with a sitcom starring only black people, then as night goes on, it lightens up a little with a sprinkle of the white man. Then at 9:30 it's a celebration of all things white trash, "The Mullets."

Now I love to laugh at mullet as much as the next guy.

Yes, I've seen Yes, I have. Yes. Stop bringing it up. No I haven't seen the documentary. What the fuck? Leave me alone!

Mullets are funny looking and that's it. It's like saying, "Hey, let's make a show based around a rainbow wig or Groucho Marx glasses." (Those two ideas appeared here first, BTW!)

The show is a story about two white trash brothers that have mullets, their friends have mullets, and even their last name is Mullet. Get it? No, I don't. Why is their last name Mullet? Does that drive the point home more? Should my last name be "$8 hair cut?" Why don't they just change their name to

The brothers are roofers and whenever they declare something is going right and their lives are going well, one of them falls off the roof or through it.

The other characters include, their MILFy mom, Loni Anderson, her new uptight "I-can't-believe-I-married-into-this-white- trash-family-good-God-look-at those-tits" husband, two or three buddies who hang out at the Mullet's house all day and have mullets including the obligatory black guy with a Jeri Curlish mullet. He's played by one of the great actors from "Fear of a Black Hat."
Let's not forget the obligatory "will they or won't they" hot Blondie love interest of the straighter brother.

The set for the house BTW, is straight out of Married with Children. With the sliding door in the back and the three diamond windows on the on the front door. Maybe they used the set for the pilot. I wish they used a couple of writers.

The brothers aren't believable. The love interest guy is too LA looking. It's like the cast directors went to Dough Boy on Third and put a mullet wig on their waiter. I'm trying to say he looks like the LA handsome guy. He's also too straight. I mean he's speech is perfect, his accent is straight out of nowhere, and you can see the acting classes all over him.

The other guy is too schicky. He shakes and looks down when giving out his wacky lines. He's doing an over the top version of the cool guy from "Dazed and Confused." Yes I know Ben Affleck is in that movie. Yes, i know he's dating what's her name.

The plot was funny; they have to listen pop music in order to win tickets to Wrestle Mania for their mom.

The show just feels false, everyday guys in mullet wigs trying to be likeable white trash.

I don't see the show catching on. They are watered down too much to for you to laugh at them and not relatable enough.

I don't want to sound racist. I like white trash. In fact my accountant and lawyer are white trash. Which is why I'm broke and going to jail.

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