Deadline

Monday, May 29, 2006

F Dial up!.

Driving around LA in my vintage SAAB convertible I was struck by this new billboard campaign. Maybe because I have the top down or because if I go over 25 miles an hour, my entire dashboard will shake, I've seen a few things about our urban landscape:

--Even though "Emily's Reasons why Not" only lasted one night, Heather Graham's big head still looms over Sunset like a South American dictator.

--Cable is constantly making and promoting movies about young Russian sex slaves. "We must save them...But first let's watch them dance!"

--Old slow internet sucks.

There are billboards all over LA that have "Dial-up" on them with "Dial" crossed off and the word "Washed" written over it. Way to take a stand! Forget this war thing, I say boo to unplugging the phone in order to get my email.

It's part of an ad campaign to get new users of some DSL.

Who comes up with telling people that something stinks, stinks? Are these the same people who created the unsuccessful, "Drowning is no fun" campaign that was all over the Atlantic Ocean? Or the "Dying is not as fun as living" that was up at Hostices around the country?

I picture a board room, annoying Apprentice rejects line the long table. An intern is organizing a plate of doughnuts.

One corporate a-hole has this great idea. He stand up in Tommy Bahama shirt (It's "Wacky over priced shirt Friday.").

"Instead of getting people who have high speed internet to change to our service because it's better, let's get the new customers. How do we get new costumers? Tell tehm that what they areusing is bad. These poor souls have no idea that dial up is bad. We need to infor them. How? through the internet? No, we established that it will take too long."

I get it. But why tell someone that their inferior product is inferior? They know that. You think there's someone in an igloo in waiting 2 hours for a down load of Paris Hilton's latest nipple slip thinking, "This is great. There couldn't be anything better than this. What? Faster connection? You speak the devil's words! Stop with thee!"

No one knows it's bad? Thanks for taking a stand. Becarefull what you print, the government is watching. You might end up on a list. A list of peopple who make obvious statements.

My guess is that people who still use dial up are doing so because of price and availability, not because they love it.

Why would someone use a third rate product when they can have something better?

Anyway, I have to go. AAA is here to tow my car.

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